Cancer makes us crazy.

Due to the waves of jolting changes in my life before Corinne got cancer, I have needed therapy or counseling for a couple of years. But, after a couple of brief starts, I backed out. At the time the “cyst” popped up on her neck, Corinne was in counseling to deal with some early traumas in her life. She was taking a mild antidepressant. When Corinne got the cancer diagnosis, she stopped therapy to focus her energies on saving her life.

The psychological pressures are tremendous. Corinne – a woman in her prime – felt she had all of the choices her life had ever offered, with the added benefit of experience and maturity. She is dealing for the first time with the possibility of death due to forces outside her control. She continues to plant seeds, looking forward to a beautiful summer, but she also feels she may have little time left in this life. She has become impatient with small talk and social niceties. She is driven to talk straight about the lessons she has learned traveling the world and adapting to many cultures over 25 years. She scoffs at political correctness. Some of her more sensitive friends find her difficult to be with now.

For the first time in more than 30 years, I am seriously seeing a therapist to work on my own issues. I, too, am taking antidepressants.

There are so many pressures from the outside on both of us that we need to shore up our internal structures just to keep from collapsing.