The emergency room doctor called in an Ear Nose & Throat specialist, who declared the lump a rare, congenital cyst; she stopped the pain and swelling with antibiotics. Two senior physicians later confirmed this diagnosis, recommending surgery to remove the cyst. Corinne – now out of pain – wanted to delay surgery, but I insisted we be assured this was not cancer. After a painful Fine Needle Aspiration, the pathology report said, "There is no malignancy."

Six months later, the lump had grown prodigiously – to the size of Corinne's fist – but the ENT specialists refused to return our concerned calls. We learned the truth from a new group of doctors who performed a surgical biopsy on Corinne's neck. The lump was Diffuse Small B-cell Lymphoma, spreading at an intermediate rate.

In my two experiences with cancer, we have replaced lots of doctors: sole practitioners and clinics, those who were too arrogant or too ignorant, too busy or too distracted, respected doctors in respected cancer centers. Some of them, we should have replaced, but didn't… and regretted it. The person with cancer is almost always afraid to do this, afraid to anger those she depends on for her life, so the Caregiver must play an active role here: sometimes even aggressive or abrasive. In the end though, it is the patient's decision what to do with her doctors.